A ‘quibi’ review of Quibi
What is Quibi? A Streaming service.
How can I watch it? On your phone (and that’s it).
How much does it cost? $12.99 per month.
How do I pronounce Quibi? Fuck Knows.
So, what is Quibi exactly?
It’s a streaming service like Netflix, Stan and Disney, but it provides exclusive, short form content (ie. no episode runs over 7 minutes) that can only be viewed on your phone. It’s seemingly designed for those that watch content on their commute to work or enjoy watching content on their work/study breaks.
The short form series are referred to as a ‘quick bites’, which is where Quibi derives its name. Is it Kwee-Bye, Kwee-bee, Kwy-bye or Kwy-bee? I really cannot decide. From the expected phonetical pronunciation of the two words, I’d think Kwee-bye, but it doesn’t sound right. What’s left together is a word that feels uncomfortable to say, no matter which way you go about it.
Personally, I’d have used ‘QUI’ and ‘TE’ and called it Quite. A word you can pronounce and a slogan waiting to happen. See below.
Idris Elba is sitting poolside at a tropical resort. We zoom in slowly, over his left shoulder, he has his phone in his hands. He is watching his own ‘Quite’ show, ‘Elba Vs. Block’. He stops and stares deeply into the camera and says, ‘It’s Quite Good’. He then sips on some tropical drink and winks at the camera.
It really is marketing nightmare, but with humans obsession with digital content, It hardly seems to matter, with Meg Whitman revealing the service copped 1.7 million downloads in it’s first 7 days. An ultra-attractive 90-day free trial helped for those who signed up before April 30th, however, the slightly less attractive 14-day free trial also helped a little. Considering 14 days (let alone 90) is enough time to get through a decent amount of the content, I see a lot people unsubscribing before the trial ends.
The content isn’t all bad, with shows like The Stranger, featuring up and coming stars Maika Monroe and Dane DeHaan and is a clear adaptation of The Hitcher.
I also managed to check out Liam Hemsworth starer, Most Dangerous Game, based on the short story of the same name by Richard Connell. It is passable entertainment and I won’t complain, but only because I’m still in the free trial period.
The other two titles I checked out, which also garner a pass mark were #FreeRayShawn and 50 States of Fright, a horror anthology from Executive Producer Sam Raimi.
These titles (all action or horror) are all passable entertainment, especially if your sitting on the bus or in your lunchroom and are into these genre’s (Just make sure you don’t go over your data limit). The ‘quick-bite’ format also works, 7 minutes does seem a bit short, but at the same time, they fit into short coffee breaks.
There are more narrative titles on the service, none I cared to watch, but it also has a litter of reality shows. None of them appealed – but I am just not the person to ask about reality TV - I have never really been invested in it beyond saying “the cabs are here” in a Pauly D accent when there weren’t actually any cabs.
All in all, I didn’t hate my time with the unpronounceable Quibi, my phone sat in front of my computer while I worked from home, and it helped pass the time. But for the small amount content I was interested in, it really isn’t worth the premium price of $12.99 a month for an ad-free subscription, so I will be unsubscribing after I save this Quibi review.
But give it time, and I will probably pay it for a couple months here and there throughout the years, just to check out what I think will interest me. But only because I commute to work for over an hour each way, I have the time to spare and a big appetite for content.
From the website, Quibi seems like it has had a successful launch, and subscriptions equal profit, and profit will equal more content. I must say, I think Quibi has smashed it out of the gate, but eventually will fall to the back of the streaming pack, break a leg, and get put down.
Head on over to page two for Andrew's take...
Andrew here, adding to Travis’ take, echoing much of what he said.
I’ve watched a few of the reality TV style shows on the service, mainly focusing on the routine pap that would usually fill up the moments in between your regularly scheduled advertising viewing. While flitting between a reality show on celebrities being gifted custom made dog houses, through to celebrities gifting strangers a million bucks, through to… a house renovation show focused on doing up ‘murder houses’, I kept coming back to the same question… is this worth $15 a month?
I signed up to Quibi on the 90-day trial because, well, who doesn’t like free stuff? And, I’ve found myself being widely disappointed with the service as a whole. The functionality is good, and extremely adaptive. The app moves like lightning; flitting through shows is quick, responsive and also mildly overwhelming. The ‘key feature’ of the app is being able to swap from landscape to portrait modes with ease. It’s a neat move, turning your phone and getting a broader view of what you’re watching, but is it a major selling point?
No, not at all. In fact, I struggle to recall any of the names of shows on the service, instead – like Travis mentioned – I can only think of the shows or movies that these slices of entertainment are not. It’s not The Hitcher. It’s not The Most Dangerous Game. It’s not The Block. But, that’s all you can think of when you’re browsing the Quibi library: other stuff.
Even the things that should be interesting – Anna Kendrick’s version of Lars and the Real Girl, or a cooking competition show with Tituss Burgess – are bland and too familiar. There’s nothing on here that feels shareable or essential viewing. Add in the fact that the amount of content that’s recycled from your Facebook feed – Dodo, TMZ, E News, and Jimmy Fallon videos galore – and really, it’s hard to say, yeah, you simply have to try out Quibi.
Add in the fact that you’re stuck watching the content on your phone, meaning that the communal aspect of watching TV disappears (although a bigger screen version is apparently in the works), all the while also being denied the chance to tweet/post about the show you’re watching, well, it makes Quibi a very insular experience. It wants to be a service for all, and yet, a service for nobody at the same time.
Which, wrapping this quick bite review of a quick bite service up, is an inherent problem that all of these services are finding in this streaming explosion of content: the dearth of ‘must watch’ content. As each new provider stumbles into the fray with Netflix, Disney, and Amazon, they need to work even harder to stand out above the rest. If Apple TV failed to capture an audience of iFaithfuls, then what hope does Quibi have? Even if the world wasn’t stuck at home, I fail to see how this would succeed in a world of commuting from home to work.
I pondered the question about what would happen to the shows on a service like Quibi if it failed, and yet, after sitting with the shows for just over a week, I find that I honestly couldn’t see a place in history where these slices of ‘entertainment’ a worthwhile retaining. That’s an awfully cruel thing to say, but from my perspective, there’s little value in jumping on the Quibi train.